The Worst Pick Up Line Contest
by TheFemalePharaoh
Summary: REPOSTED! IT's back and better than ever...I hope. The last one was deleted. This one is a crossover between YGO, InuYasha, and Samurai Deeper Kyo. I pray you like this one. Please review to cast your votes as before. The worst pick up line wins!
1. Welcome to Our Show!

Title: The Worst Pick Up Lines EVER Contest

Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh

Rating: M

Genre: Romance/Humor

Disclaimer: NOT MINE

* * *

_**A/N: Sorry folks, but the last one was deleted. I had to wait until I was able to put this one up. Please accept my apologiwes for that. this is a YGO/IY/SDK crossover one and I hope you like it. As always, suggestions for lines are welcome and I will give credit for the ones I use toward the end of each chapter. Remember to review to vote. Thanks and I apologize once again! **_

_**The Female Pharaoh**_

* * *

**WELCOME TO OUR SHOW!**

* * *

(audience claps) 

"Welcome back to our game show! This is TFP, your pretty hostess, and what's it called?" asked TFP.

"THE WORST PICK UP LINE EVER!" replied the audience.

"That's right and I am your pretty hostess, TheFemalePharaoh...or TFP for short. The rules are simple...the WORST pick up line wins! When I say worst, I mean anything_ sick, funny gross, perverted, stupid, even old as dirt. In other words anything that would either get you laughed out the club, your face slapped, youe eyes maced, or even get you arrested_. ARE YOU READY TO MEET WITH OUR CONTESTANTS FROM YU-GI-OH?!"

The audnece cheers and whistles.

"Alrighty then! Let's being 'em on out!" said TFP.

"Now, for our first contestant...the adorable chibi we all want to hug until there's no breath left in his body...YUUGI MUTOU!" announced TFP.

Yuugi walked on stage, blushing madly as he heard thousands of fangirls scream, "HE'S SO CUTE!"

* * *

"Our next contestant is the King of Games, the former King of Ancient Egypt, as well as the king of most of our fantasies...YAMI ATEMU!" announced TFP. 

Yami walked smoothly onstage, flasing a smile to the audinece, making people swoon and faint as he took his place beside Yuugi.

* * *

"The next contestant is considered the original Game Master. He may be old, but he definitely has new tricks up his sleeve...SOLOMON MUTOU!" announced TFP. 

People were cheering loudly as Solomon walked onstage to take his place beside his grandsons.

* * *

"The next contestant is the CEO of Kaiba corp, with fire in his eyes, as well as ice up his ass, the one and only...SETO KAIBA!" announced TFP. 

Girls and some guys screamed as Seto walke,d gracefully onstage, glaring at TFP before sitting down.

* * *

"Next up, is another adorable chibi that is the complete opposite of his big brither...MOKUBA KAIBA!" announced TFP. 

Mokie ran onstage as thousands of girls sighed, "AWWWWW!" He laughed, blushed and sat next to Seto.

* * *

"Next one, the cyber-jerk that tried to steal Mokie's body...NOAH KAIBA!" announced TFP. 

Noah walked onstage as eveyone booed and hissed. Noah shot TFP daggers with his eyes as he sat down.

* * *

"Now, the handsome aquatic stud muffin known as the freaky fish guy...MAKO TSUNAMI!" announced TFP. 

Mako came onstage and took off his shirt, making TFP and ther girls go insane with his hotness.

* * *

"Calming donw now...our next guy was King Atem's high priest, and another complete opposite of Seto...SETH!" 

Seth strode onto the stage smiling, making people melt. He sits next to Mokie.

* * *

"Next up...he's mysterious, he's handsone, he's Egyptian... he's SHADI!" announced TFP. 

Shadi walked onstage, removinghis turban, letting his hair flow down his shoulders. Women screaming and blowing him kisses as he took his seat.

* * *

"Now, the handsone beefcake that is the Egyptian version of Mr. Clean...ODION!" announced TFP 

Odion walked out and women were throwing HIM roses as he sat down.

* * *

"Next, the creator of Duel Monsters who needs to wear something _other_ than that lame red suit-the male prima donna...PEGASUS!" 

Pegasus came out throwing roses to everyone onstage and the audience as he took his seat, glaring at TFP as he did so.

* * *

"Next, the smexy whitenette with that smexy British accent...RYOU!" 

Ryou was beet red as women screamed his name and some men whistled. He hurried to his seat.

* * *

"The former tomb robber, who steals hearts as he did Yami's treasures...BAKURA!" 

Bakura came out, flashing a smile to the audience befiore taking his seat next to his Ryou.

* * *

"Moving on...Yami's handsome tombkeeper who is sexy as all hell...MALIK ISHTAR!" announced TFP. 

Malik wanted to run backstage, but his yami shoved him onstage. He took his seat after muttering Egyptian curses under his breath.

* * *

"Malik's dark and your favorite psycho...MARIK!" announced TFP. 

Everyone gasped in fear as Marik came onstage laughing maniacally as he took his seat.

* * *

"Yes, well...Solmon's best friend of umpteen decades...ARTHUR HAWKINS!" announced TFP. 

The audience clapped politely as Arthur walked and sat beside Solomon, shaking his hand.

* * *

"Now for the coachroach that is hard to kill...WEEVIL UNDERWOOD!" announced TFP. 

Weevil glares at TFP and the audence, who was booing like crazy as he sat down.

* * *

"Next up, the idiot that was stupid enough to follow Weevil...REX RAPTOR!" announced TFP. 

Hearing the boos and jeers, Rex sat down to Weevil, plotting TFP's death (as if).

* * *

"Next one, the golden puppy that is the definition of _dumb blond_...JOEY WHEELER!" announced TFP. 

Joey walks out glaring at TFP, but smiled at the girls screaminghis name as he sat.

* * *

"The ever-loyal sidekick that deserve more recognition than he gets...TRISTAN TAYLOR!" announced TFP. 

Tritan is welcomed by cheers and whoops from the audience.

* * *

"The dice man himself...DUKE DEVLIN!" announced TFP 

Cheers erupted as Duke graced the stage.

* * *

"The wacked out bastard form Atlantis, who stole Yuugi's soul and made Yami cry...DARTZ!" announced TFP 

Dartz glared at TFP and the audience as they booed, hissed and shouted insults as well as death threats.

* * *

"The blond joke that needs to be shot for what that cheap stunt he tried to pull on Joey...BANDIT KEITH!" announced TFP. 

Bandit Keith tried to strangle TFP but was stopped by Yami's Eye of Horus.

* * *

"Thanks, Yami...now, the man that would make Pegasus look toned-down, the overdressed peacock...SEIGFRIED VON SHROUDER (sp?)!" announced TFP. 

Siggy walked onstage as the audinece burst out lauging at his outfit.

* * *

"Finally...his adorable brother...LEONARDO!" announced TFP 

Everyone cheered as he walked onstage. Blushing and lauging, he sat down.

* * *

"Now, for a new twist to this game..the guys from Yu-Gi-Oh will now compete against the guys from two other amine shows!" said TFP, making people scream in approval. 

"Thanks, now let me introduce the men from the hit anime series...INUYASHA!" said TFP, making the audence cheer.

* * *

"First up...the hot-headed hanyou that can give Seto a run for his money in the attitude department...INUYASHA!" announced TFP. 

Inuyasha walks out among cheers from the audience. He talkes his seat.

* * *

"Next, his handsome, but twisted full-demon brother...SESSHOMARU!" announced TFP. 

Sesshomaru strode onstage, glaring at the hostess and the audnece as well as take his seat.

* * *

"The perverted monk who will once day be on Maury Povich taking a bazillion paternity tests...MIROKU!" announced TFP. 

Miroku walked onstage glaering as he took his seat. "I am not a pervert!" yelled Miroku.

* * *

"Sure you're not...NOW, next up, the devil incarnate...NARAKU!" annouced TFP. 

Naraku walked onstage, glaring at TFP, but sits down because he can't use his powers.

* * *

"The adorable fox-demon that will be a ladykiller when he grows up...SHIPPO!" announced TFP. 

Everyone awwed as Shippo walked out laughing and blushing as he sat down.

* * *

"Sango's little brother who has the potential to win over girls himself...KOHAKU!" announced TFP. 

Everyone cheered as Kohaku walked onstage, sitting next to Miroku.

* * *

"Now, the boy that Kagome keeps turning down at her school...HOJO!" announced TFP. 

Hojo walks out blushing like mad as he hears fangirls scream his name. He quickly took his seat.

* * *

"Now, for the next contestant...he is a wolf-demon prince who is determined to win Kagome by any means necessaey...KOUGA!" announced TFP. 

Kouga walks onstage, smiling handsomely as he hears ladies scream out his name.

* * *

"Now, the adorble little brother that Kagome loves so much...SOTA HIGARASHI!" announced TFP. 

Sota walks out blushing as he hears. "AWWW!" from the viewers.

* * *

"The former leader of the Band of Seven who is sexy as all get out...BANKOTSU!" announced TFP. 

The Banryu-wielding stud graces the stage, making ladies swoon.

* * *

"The infamous swordsmith that forged Tetsusaiga, Tenseiga, and possibly Sounga; why in the hell is he even here to begin with...TOTOSAI!" announced TFP. 

Totosai looked around, looking confused, befiore he sat down. Faint clapping was heard in the audience.

* * *

"Last, but in no wise the least...the father of both Inuyasha and Sesshomaru...the ever handome great dog demon himself...INUTAISHO (sp?)!" announced TFP. 

Inutaisho walked majestically onstage, makeing women faint and men jealous as he sat next to his sons.

* * *

"Now finally...the men form the hit series...SAMURAI DEEPER KYO!" shouted TFP, making people cheer even louder.

* * *

"First up, he's has an innocent face and a perverted mind to match...KYOSHIRO MIBU!"announced TFP. 

Kyoshiro almost went deaf from all the "HE'S SO CUTE!" comments.

* * *

"The handome, dark, thousand-man slayer...DEMON EYES KYO!" annouced TFP. 

Kyo went onstage, winked and smiled at the audience, causing ladies to melt in thier seats.

* * *

"The young lord that intends to rule one day...YUKIMURA SANADA!" announced TFP. 

Yukimura enters with his dazzling smile and sparlking eyes...making women and MEN faint.

* * *

"Yukimura's young sidekick who wields Shibien...SASUKE!" announced TFP. 

Sasuke walks onstage hearing "HE'S SO CUTE!"

* * *

"Yukimura's other sidekick that is WAY too loyal for me...SAIZO!" 

Everyone was cheering as a blusing Saizo walked out.

* * *

"The heir to the Tokogawa shogunate, Hidetada Tokugawa, but known to us as...BENITORA!" announced TFP. 

Benitora waved to the crowd blowing hisses as ladies swooned and sighed at his awesome-ness.

* * *

"The swordsmith of the Mibu clan that gave up his immortality for the woman he loved...MURAMASA!" announced TFP. 

TFP and other owmen blushed as Muramasa smiled at them as he waslked out.

* * *

"The older brother of Yukimura, who sided with the Tokugawa for Benitora's sake...NOBUYUKI SANADA!" announced TFP. 

Wild cheering took place as Nobuyuki walked outo n stage to join his brother.

* * *

"The hottie with fire in one eye and ice in the other...MIGEIRA!" announced TFP. 

A difnified, yet faintly blushing Migeira waks out to join the others amidst the cheering crowd.

* * *

"Finally, the sick-ass bastard that tried to pit the Sanada brothers against each other, Benitora's father...IEYASU TOKUGAWA!" announced TFP 

Ieyasu glared at TFP as the crown went wild...with boos and hisses...even from his own son.

* * *

"The cast from Yu-Gi-Oh will go first! Let the games begin!" shouted TFP. 

The audience cheered.

* * *

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND ONE-YAMI v. SETO...TAKING ALL BETS!**


	2. Yami versus Seto

Title: The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever Contest

Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh

Rating: M

Genre: Humor

Disclaimer: NOT MINE!

* * *

KONBANWA, MINNA-SAN! 

I am SO glad to be back writing again! I have had a personal crisis that was going on and I am glad to say I am about finished with that! YAY!

So, I apologize to all my loyal readers and reviewers...especially to you, Journey Maker! I am so sorry that I have not reviewed any of your fine work as of late, but rest assured, I WILL DO SO! Please forgive me for being away for so long and as always, you are my friend forever and I love you in the precious name of our Lord!

So..without any more delay...LET'S GET ON WITH IT!

* * *

**ROUND ONE: YAMI v. SETO**

* * *

"Welcome back to our show called what?!" asked TFP. 

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

That's right! We're back with our first round ready to go. Yami versus Seto Kaiba. Will Yami and Seto please take yout places at the gaming arena?" said TFP. Yami and Seto complied.

"Now the rules of this round are indeed simple...you each get to say three lines in turn. Yami won the coin toss, so he goes first. Come up with the craziest, most pathetic, asinine, sleazy, whatever...you get the point, okay?"

Both men nodded.

"Good! Yami...go!" said TFP.

Yami cleared his throat and began:

* * *

**_"Say, baby...if you'll be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King. Treat me right and we can do it your way...right away!"_**

* * *

Needless to say, the audience was indeed quiet from shock.

Seto looked at the Game King. "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!"

Yuugi was staring at Yami with shock in his eyes. "Uh, Yami? I do believe that will get you laughed out the bar."

"Either that or arrested" chimed in Jou.

"Or shot" said Tristan.

"Or slapped silly" said Duke, laughing his head off.

"I will never eat at Burger King ever again!" yelled Noah, disgusted.

TFP was trying to erase the disturbing images that line created. "Seto...please go."

Seto smirked and began:

* * *

**_"Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I got sake, porn and condoms...now let's go screw!"_**

* * *

Mokuba spat our his jiuce. "NII-SAN?!"

Shadi was in shock. "Oh...my...RA!"

The audinece gasped and said a collective "...HUH?!"

Yami was disgusted. "AND YOU SAID MINE WAS BAD! THAT WAS HORRIBLE!"

TFP was visible shaken at that line. "Y-Y-Yami...go."

Yami gathered his thoughts and began again:

* * *

**_"So...do you believe in love at first sight...or should I just walk by you again?"_**

* * *

This time the audience shrieked in laughter. Yami looked slightly haunted. Ryou deadpanned. 

Solomon shook his head. "That was the lamest line ever!"

Seth laughed. "I must agree with Mr. Mutou here. My Pharaoh, whatever possessed you to say such a line?"

Duke responded, "His ego."

TFP had to say something. "Yami...that was...uh...I can't find any words to describe that. Seto, your turn."

Seto faced the audience and began again:

* * *

**_"Excuse me, but would you like to dance...or would you rather that I just stomp on your feet right here instead?"_**

* * *

The audence responded with a collective "OUCH!" 

Yuugi just stared at the CEO. "Damn, Seto...you sure have a way with words, don't ya?"

Jou was too bust laughing to even give a decent response, as were Tristan, Ryou, Shadi, and Mako.

TFP groaned at that line of Seto's. "Yami, last one for you!"

Yami stared ahead and said:

* * *

_**"I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Walmart, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter."**_

* * *

Everyone, contestants and audience alike, gasped. "UGH!" 

TFP just stared at Yami. "YAMI! THAT WAS JUST WRONG!"

Yuugi shook his head at his dark. "Yami, damn that was harsh!"

Seto was laughing his ass off along with Bakura.

Malik just stared at Yami. "...and YOU'RE supposed to be the hero?!"

Solomon just glared. "For SHAME, Yami!"

TFP sighed. "Seto...close us out."

Seto regained his composure and ended it with:

* * *

_**"Hi, I'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?"**_

* * *

Everyone together grimaced and shouted, "EEEWWWWWWWW!" 

Seth blanced. "Seto Kaiba...that was just gross!"

Marik was laughing his head off. "Damn, Kaiba...I didn't know you were into THAT!"

TFP jumped up. "TIME! GAME OVER! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next sagment. Please return to your placed."

Yami and Seto did so.

"Now, then...this round is over and the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...the Pharaoh or the CEO? We'll be right back for Round Two!" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Will it be the Pharaoh or the CEO? You choose! 

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND TWO...YUUGI v. MOKUBA**


	3. Yuugi versus Mokuba

Title: The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever Contest

Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh

Rating: M

Genre: Humor

Disclaimer: NOT MINE!

* * *

**ROUND TWO: YUUGI v. MOKUBA

* * *

**

"Welcome back to our show called what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"That's right! We've tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**YAMI: 8 SETO: 3

* * *

**

"The winner of Round One was...YAMI!" yelled TFP.

The crowd cheered as Yami made his way to the Winners' Circle. Seto, shouting profanities and lawsuit threats, stormed backstage.

"Now for Round Two. Will Yuugi and Mokuba please take yout places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

Yuugi and Mokuba were there, ready to start.

"Again, the rules of this round are indeed simple...you each get to say three lines in turn. Mokuba won the coin toss, so he goes first."

Both boys nodded.

"Good! Mokie...go!" said TFP.

Mokie smiled and began:

* * *

**_"Can I take a nude picture of you? I want Santa to know exactly what I want for Christmas."_**

* * *

Screams of cheers were heard from the audience.

Seto death-glared his brother. "MOKUBA, WHAT THE FUCK?!"

Yami was shaking his head. "Damn, that was a good one. I never knew he had it in him."

"You stay away from Serenity...ya hear me, ya li'l perv?!" mock-glared Joey.

"Or any girl in your school, for that matter" muttered Ryou. red-faced..

TFP was wiping the tea she spat out off her face."Next...Yuugi, shoot."

Yuugi took a deep breath and said:

* * *

**_"Let's make like a fabric softener and Snuggle."_

* * *

**

You can hear the audience sigh. "AWWWWWW!"

"Damn, that sucked, you dork" said Bakura, before he was whacked by Ryou.

"Yuugi, my boy, I'm your grandfather...and I can come up with better lines than that!" said Solomon.

"You did well, Aibou. Paid no heed to them" assured Yami, who was giving death glares to Seto, who was beside himself with laughter backstage.

TFP decided not to comment. "Mokie...go."

Mokuba thought for a minute and said:

* * *

_**"Excuse me, Miss. Did you see my lost puppy? I think he went inside Room Number 512 of that Motel 6 across the street."

* * *

**_

The audience just gasped and shouted in unison, "WHAT THE HELL?!"

Seth just shook his head. "Like Seto...like Mokuba."

Shadi was beside himself woth laughter, as was Pegasus.

Seto shouted, "MOKUBA! ONE MORE PERVERTED LINE AND YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE!"

TFP had to say something. "You know what, Mokie? Forget it...Yuugi, go."

Yuugi smirked as he began:

* * *

**_"You must work at Subway...because you just gave me a footlong."_**

* * *

The audence was dead quiet with shock.

Yami stared wide-eyed and red-faced at Yuugi. "YUUGI! THAT WAS HORRIBLE!"

Tristan, Jou and Bakura was in stitches with laughter.

"Damn, Pharaoh...I never knew he had it in him" laughed Marik, mockingYami from earlier.

TFP was making a mental note to NEVER eat at Subway's again.. "Mokie, last one for you!"

Mokuba smiled, winked and said:

* * *

_**"I'm the Love Pirate and I am here for your booty...AAARGH!"

* * *

**_

Along with the audience, the studio producers were laughing theirs heads off.

Seto was seeing red. **"MOKUBA KENJI KAIBA...YOU ARE SO GROUNDED UNTIL THE DAY _I_ DIE!"**

Yami laughed. "Shut up, Kaiba. He got that from you, anyways!"

Ryou and Malik was just too red-faced to speak.

Jou shook his head. "You litle perv, if you ever say that to Serenity.."

TFP sighed. "Yuugi...take us on out."

Yuugi stopped laughing and ended it with:

* * *

**_"Do you have a Band Aid? I just scrapped my knee falling for you."

* * *

_**

Everyone groaned, "LAME!"

Seto was just shaking his head. "What grade are you really in, Yuugi?"

Arthur chuckled. "Son, I must tell you this one thing...that line sucked ass."

Everyone was staring at the once-dignified professor Hawkins in horrorfied shock.

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next sagment. Please return to your places."

Yuugi and Mokuba complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...the Protege of Duel Monsters or the CEO's Successor? We'll be right back for Round Three!" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Yuugi or Mokuba...your choice.

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND THREE...BAKURA v. MALIK**


	4. Bakura versus Malik

Title: The Worst Pick-Up Lines Contest

Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh

Rating: M

Genre: Humor

Disclaimer: NOT MINE

**

* * *

****ROUND THREE: BAKURA v. MALIK

* * *

**

"Alrighty, folks! Welcome back to our show called what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"As always, we've tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**YUUGI: 3 ...MOKUBA: 10

* * *

**

"The winner of Round Two...by a landslide... was...MOKUBA!" yelled TFP.

"YES!" yelled Seto. "In your face, Yami!"

Mokie went to the winner's section with Yami and Yuugi went backstage with Seto.

"Now for Round Three. Will Bakura and Malik please take yout places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

Bakura and Malik did as they were told.

"Again, the rules of this round are indeed simple...you each get to say three lines in turn. Malik won the coin toss, so he goes first."

"Yes!" cheered Malik.

"Damn it!" cursed Bakura.

"Go for it, Malik!" said TFP.

Malik began:

* * *

**_"Excuse me...have I fucked you yet?"_**

* * *

Gasps filled the air as Marik laughed his ass off. 

Yuugi shook his head backstage. "Damn, and I thought I stunk!"

Solomon looked like he was about to faint.

A red-faced and gaping TFP was recovering from the shock of Malik's sick excuse for a line. "Go, Bakura."

Bakura smiled and said:

* * *

**_"I must expel some seminal fluid. May I use your body?"_**

* * *

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!" yelled TFP. 

"Ha! Told ya he was a nerd" laughed Shadi.

Seth and Tristan were laughing their asses off.

"How terribly crude, yet scientifically sound" said Arthur.

"Just go, Malik" sighed TFP.

Malik smiled ans said:

* * *

**_"Hi, my name is Malik, I like peanut butter and Duel Monsters...wanna fuck?"_**

* * *

The audience just gasped and shouted in unison, "WHAT THE HELL?!" 

Pegasus was stunned. "How sad and how tacky!"

Solomon concurred. "I'm with Pegasus!"

People stared at Solomon in horror.

Solomon realized how it sounded and blushed. "That kinda came out wrong, huh?"

Seto shouted, "NO SHIT! YA THINK?!"

"Go, Bakura" TFP said, shaking her head.

Bakura blurted out:

* * *

**_"What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply?"_**

* * *

The audence was dead quiet with shock folowed by shrieks. 

Arthur was flabbergasted. "Oh dear!"

"Damn, at least he's to the point" muttered Tristan

"Seto! Make him stop!" yelled poor Mokie.

"YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN BE TALKING WITH THOSE SICK ASS LINES FROM EARLIER!" yelled Seto.

:Bakura is ginna make us all drop outta school today" muttered TFP. "Last one, Malik"

Malik thought for a minute and said:

**_

* * *

_**

**_"I'm gonna have sex with you tonight so, you might as well be there!"_**

* * *

Ryou was too stunned to speak...as were the audience. 

Solomon was shock beyond reason. "Oh, dear...LORD!"

Mako was laughing. "Didn't give them a choice, eh?"

Yuugi fell over laughing.

"Bakura...end it...just end this sorry segment" moaned TFP.

Bakura smiled maniacally and said:

* * *

**_"Hey, baby, wanna lock crotches and swap gravy?"_**

* * *

TFP ran off to vomit in the sink and the audience shrieked a collective "EWWWWW! YUCK! GROSS!" 

Yami was dry-heaving on the floor along with Mokie.

Malik looked haunted and sick. "YOU SICK FUCK!"

TFP and Ryou walked up to Bakura and slapped him silly.

"OW! DAMN IT! THAT HURT!" yelled Bakura.

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next sagment. Please return to your places." 

Bakura and Malik complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...The Tomb Robber or The Tombkeeper? We'll be right back for Round Four!" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Bakura or Malik...your choice. 

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND FOUR...RYOU v. MARIK**


	5. Ryou versus Marik

**Title: The Worst Pick-Up Line Contest**

**Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh**

**Genre: Humor**

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: NOT MINE!**

* * *

**ROUND FOUR: RYOU v. MARIK

* * *

**

"What's up?! Welcome back to our show called...what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"Once again we've tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**MALIK: 3... BAKURA: 10

* * *

**

"The winner of Round Three was BAKURA!" yelled TFP.

"NOOOOOOOOO!" yelled Mokie. "PLEASE, RA, NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Bakura went to the winner's section and Malik went backstage.

"Now for Round Four. Will Ryou and Marik please take yout places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

Ryou was sweating bullets and Marik was laughing maniacally as they did as they were told.

"You know the rules...you each get to say three lines in turn. Ryou won the coin toss, so he goes first."

"Oh, dear" muttered Ryou.

"You had better not screw this up, hikari!" cursed Bakura.

"Bakura's bluffing, Ryou. Go ahead" said TFP.

Ryou gulped and began:

* * *

**_"Excuse me, Miss, but if I bit my lip, will you kiss it better?"_**

* * *

Ryou was beet red as everyone in the audience laughed.

Yuugi shook his head backstage. "Damn, that was just lame!"

"Shut the hell up, you shrimpy ass verion of that royal failure known to us as Yami!" yelled Bakura.

"Watch yourself, Tomb Robber!" yelled Yami.

"Fuck you, Pharaoh!" yelled Bakura.

"BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE HELL UP!" yelled Solomon.

"Yes, sir" whispered Yami and Bakura.

"That was...okay, Ryou. Go Marik" said TFP.

Marik grinned and said:

* * *

**_"Hey, let's play the Price is Right. Your pants and panties just won...so bring 'em on down!"_**

* * *

"YOU PERV! WHAT THE FUCK?!" yelled TFP.

Solomon was laughing himself to death along with Authur.

"Remind me to have that show cancelled when we leave" said Seto.

"SICKO!" yelled Yuugi.

"Ryou, just go ahead" said TFP.

Ryou cleared his throat and said:

* * *

**_"Have you ever been hunting before? No? Well, then how about you come up to my cabin with me this weekend and I can teach you how well I can stuff a beaver...namely yours?"_**

* * *

TFP spat out her tea. "RYOU?!"

The audience gasped, "Not the innocent one?!"

Bakura whistles. "Damn...I didn't think he had it in him. I'm so proud!"

Yami stared in complete shock.

Seth and Shadi were just plain speechless.

"Always the quiet ones" muttered Malik

"Come on, Psycho...err, Marik" said TFP.

Marik thought for a second and said:

* * *

_**"Let's play Superheoes. I can be Superman adn fuck you faster than a speeding bullet."

* * *

**_

The audience shrieked in shock.

"Excuse me, folks" TFP said, then she walked up to Marik and whacked him in his head.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed Joey, Seto, Seth, Shadi, Yami, Bakura, and Tristan.

"You are one sick ass fool!" muttered Mako, with Duke nodding.

"Last one for you, Ryou" said TFP.

"Thank Ra" Ryou muttered as he said:

* * *

**_"Hello, I may have just met you but I feel like I have known you all my life and I love you. What hotel room should I reserve?"_**

* * *

The audience gasped a collective "HUH?!"

Duke was shaking his head. "Lame as Hell!"

Shadi snickered. "Sad, just sad."

Yami just laughed...and laughed again.

"Marik...take us on out...not literally, though" sighed TFP.

Marik laughed and said:

* * *

**_"Did you clean your panties with Windex? I can practically see myself in them."_**

* * *

TFPand everyone in the audience and on stage shouted "PERVERT!!"

Yuugi was laughing backstage, as were Seto and Yami.

Bakura was in stitches and even Ryou had to giggle.

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next sagment. Please return to your places."

Ryou adn Marik complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...The Earth Angel or The Psycho? We'll be right back for Round Five!" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

My thanks to Sock Monkeys for the line for Ryou.

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Ryou or Marik...your choice.

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND FIVE...JOEY v. SHADI**


	6. Joey versus Shadi

**Title: The Worst Pick-Up Line Contest**

**Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh**

**Genre: Humor**

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: NOT MINE!**

* * *

**ROUND FIVE: JOEY v. SHADI **

* * *

"Hey, guys! Welcome back to our show called...what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"We tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**MARIK: 9 ... RYOU: 2 **

* * *

"Sadly, the winner of Round Four was MARIK!" yelled TFP.

"Oh great, the psycho won!" muttered Yami.

Marik went to the winner's section and Ryou went backstage.

"Now for Round Five. Will Joey and Shadi please take yout places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

Joey was grinning and flashing the victory sign amd Shadi was shaking his head at him as they did as they were told.

"You know the routine...you each get to say three lines. Shadi won the coin toss, so he goes first."

"I understand" said a dignified Shadi.

"We'll all be going to sleep shortly" muttered Joey, making the audinece laugh.

"Quiet, you. Go ahead, Shadi" said TFP.

Shadi took a deep breath and said:

* * *

**_"Have I seen you before? Oh yeah, you look like my next girlfriend!"_**

* * *

Shadi stiffened as he heard Yami and Bakura laughing histerically from the winner's section...along with the audience. 

"Sad, man...just bloody sad" said Arthur, shaking his head.

"Please tell me Ishizu didn't fall for that lame ass line!" shouted Malik.

"I can see you getting shot down in the future" said Mako.

"Leave Shadi alone..." started Yami.

"You are very kind, my Pharaoh" said Shadi.

"...it's not his fault he fails in the world of women" snickered Yami.

"I take it back" Shadi said heatedly.

"Let's go, Joey" said TFP.

Joey smiled and said:

* * *

**_"If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous."_**

* * *

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!" shouted TFP.

"Joey, do you think of noting but food?" asked Yami, shaking his head.

"Only when he breathes" said Mokuba, laughing his ass off.

"I will never eat at McDonald's ever again!" yelled Yuugi.

""Or me for that matter" muttered Ryou.

"Let's go, Shadi" said TFP.

Shadi thought for a moment and said:

* * *

_**"You might not be the best looking woman in here, but beauty is only a light switch away." **_

* * *

"THAT WAS AN INSULT, YOU JERK!" yelled Solomon.

The audience was too outraged to voice their discontent.

"That was just mean, Shadi!" yelled Mokie.

Joey was stunned.

"If you _ever_ say that to Ishizu, I'll kick your ass!" yelled Malik, seething.

"You're a fool!" shouted Mako.

Go, Jou...just go" said TFP.

Joey smiled as he said:

* * *

_**"Wow, babe, your eyes are bluer than the water in my toilet before I take a monster piss!" **_

* * *

"OH, EEEEEWWWWW!!" yelled the audience.

TFP was vomiting in the wastebasket next to her seat... after she was done, she whacked Joey upside his head.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed Seto, Seth, and Bakura.

"That was most vile!" yelled Duke, looking a bit greenish.

"Joseph! That was disgusting!" yelled Arthur.

"Last one for you, Shadi" said TFP.

Shadi grinned and said:

* * *

_**"Excuse me, Miss, but did you know that 69 means free dinner for two? Would you like to get some?" **_

* * *

"OH, MY RA!" yelled the audience as they were making gagging sounds.

"EWWW!" yelled Mokie, covering up his ears.

"You fucking pervert!" Seto yelled.

Tristan was beside himself with laughter as was Bakura.

"End it, Joey" muttered a pale and sickly TFP.

Joey cleared his throat and said:

* * *

_**"Your body's name must be Visa...because it's everywhere I want to be." **_

* * *

Everyone in the audience and on stage shouted "LAME!!"

"I will be cutting pu my Visa credit cards later on" said Seto backstage.

"I hear ya, brother...me too" said Mokie.

"I will be burning my Visa credit cards during the commerical break" said TFP.

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next sagment. Please return to your places." 

Joey and Shadi complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...The Blond Puppy or The Mystery Man? We'll be right back for Round Six!" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

Once again, my thank you to Sock Monkeys for the line used by Shadi. 

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Joey or Shadi...your choice.

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND SIX...(THE SILVER ROUND) SOLOMON v. ARTHUR**


	7. Solomon versus Arthur

**Title: The Worst Pick-Up Line Contest**

**Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh**

**Genre: Humor**

**Rating: M**

**Disclaimer: NOT MINE!**

* * *

**ROUND SIX: SOLOMON v. ARTHUR**

* * *

"Hey, guys! Welcome back to our show called...what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"Once again, we tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**JOEY: 3 ... SHADI: 7 **

* * *

"The winner for this round is...SHADI!" yelled TFP.

"How did he win? His were just lame!" yelled Joey.

"They voted...he won...you lost...shut up" replied TFP.

Joey stormed backstage while Shadi sat in the Winner's Section

"Now for Round Six...The Silver Round. Will Solomon and Arthur please take your places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

Both men complied.

"You know the drill...you each get to say three lines. Arthur won the coin toss, so he goes first."

"Good" said Arthur.

"Let's go!" shouted Solomon.

"Go ahead, Arthur" said TFP.

Arthur began with:

**_"If you will be Christine Daae, I'll be you're Phantom...and we'll make the very chandelier break with our love!"_**

* * *

"Huh?" said TFP.

"Oh, holy Ra! That sucked!" laughed Yami.

"That was bautiful" sniffed Ryou.

"Please retire from picking up women, old man" yelled Seto.

"That was...okay" assured Yuugi.

"Are you nuts?! That was FUCKING LAME!" yelled Bakura.

"Shut up!" yelled Tristan.

"That was...okay, I guess...like Yuugi said" said Mokuba.

"Solomon...showtime" said TFP.

A grinnign Solomon said:

* * *

_**''Do you have a map? I got lost in your eyes." **_

* * *

"Oh, please Solomon...that was just pathetic" said Pegasus.

"Shut up, Fruity Pebbles! I would like to see you do any better!" yelled Marik.

"I can do better than that" said Dartz.

"Need I remind you about your record of failure?" asked Seth.

"That was kinda suckish...for real" said Duke.

"Your second one, Arthur" said TFP.

Arthur pondered and said:

* * *

_**"I may not be the best looking person here...but I'm the only one talking to you." **_

* * *

**"ARTHUR! THAT WAS SO RUDE!"** yelled Yami.

The audience, once again, too outraged to voice their discontent.

"Oh, my! That was most appalling! Do you think you will get anything better than a slap?" asked a shocked Ryou.

"Yeah...a fistful of his teeth handed to him" snickered Joey.

"Real or the dentures?" laughed Bakura.

"That was horrible!" yelled Yuugi.

"Go, Solomon" said TFP.

Solomon looked straight at the camera and said:

* * *

_**"Did you know women are like parking spots? All the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped. Which are you?"**_

* * *

**"SOLOMON MUTO! THAT WAS JUST WRONG!"** yelled TFP..

The audience was too busy laughing their heads off.

Seth was beside himself with laughter.

"Grandpa, that was just **_mean_**!" Yuugi yelled.

"For _shame_, Solomon" said Pegasus

"Thank God...the last one for you, Arthur" said an enraged TFP.

Authur smiled and said:

* * *

_**"I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away." **_

* * *

"LAME AS HELL!" yelled Joey and Tristan while Duke laughed his ass off.

"Hello, Arthur...can you hear me from back there in the **_Jurassic Period_**?" said Marik.

"Damn, I am a kid...and I can do better than that!' yelled Mokie.

"Solomon...please end this" said TFP, shaking her head.

Solomon smiled connivingly and ended it with:

* * *

_**"You might as well sleep with me because I'm going to tell everybody we did it anyway."**_

* * *

"Oh, good heavens!" yelled TFP, whacking Solomon upside his head with a rolled-up newspaper.

"You creep!" yelled the women in the audience.

"Damn, Solomon...I knew you were a dirty old man...but that was just **_too much_**!" shuddered Seto.

Yami and Bakura were beside themselves in a laughing fit...along with Marik.

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next segment. Please return to your places."

Solomon and Arthur complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...The Original Duel Master or The EGYTPIAN RUINS FANATIC? We'll be right back for Round Seven!" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

Once again, my thank you to PharaohFelicia and Sock Monkeys for their lines.

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Solomon or Arthur...your choice.

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND SEVEN...PEGASUS v. TRISTAN**


	8. Pegasus versus Tristan

Title: The Worst Pick-Up Line Contest

Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh

Genre: Humor

Rating: M

Disclaimer: NOT MINE!

**ROUND SEVEN : PEGASUS v. TRISTAN**

* * *

"Hey, guys! Welcome back to our show called...what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"As always, we tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**SOLOMON: 10 ... ARTHUR: 1**

* * *

"The winner for this round is..._yeah, like we didn't know_...**SOLOMON**!" yelled TFP.

"GO, GRANPA!" yelled Joey, Tristan, Yuugi, and Mokuba.

"Well done" replied Yami, grinning.

Arthur went backstage while Solomon sat in the Winner's Section

"Now for Round Seven, will Pegasus and Tristan please take your places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

"Come along, Tristan-boy. Time to get this show on the road" Pegasus sing-songed, making Tristan nervous.

"Aw man! Why do I have to compete with Peggy-Peggy-Fruit-Fruit?!" yelled Tristan.

"Either go to I'll call Serenity and tell her you are too much of a wuss to go through this!" yelled TFP.

"NO! DON'T YOU DARE!" begged Tristan. Then he sighed, "Fine, I'll go."

Both men complied.

"You know how it goes...you each get to say three lines. Peggy won the coin toss, so he goes first."

"Ooh, wonderful" said Pegasus.

"DAMN!" shouted Tristan.

"Let's go, Peggy" said TFP.

Pegasus started with:

* * *

**_"I think I know you, but I'm having a hard time recognizing you with your clothes on. Would you care to refresh my memory?"_**

* * *

"Oh, good Lord! You creep!" said TFP.

"Oh my!" whispered Ryou, shocked speechless...as were the audience.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed Bakura, Marik and Shadi.

"I know one thing...if he says that to a man, they'll beat the fuck out of him" declared Seto.

"I would" said Yami, shuddering.

Duke was frightened.

"Perv!" yelled Shadi.

"Triatan, go" said TFP.

A lecherous Tristan declared:

* * *

**_''I may be no Fred Flinstone, but I can make your bed rock."_**

* * *

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!" said Seth, horrorfied.

"Damn...that kinda sounded good there" said Marik.

"Are you nuts?! That was just horrible!" yelled Malik.

"Damn, that was my favorite classic cartoon" said Solomon.

"One I will never watch in the same way again" said Yuugi.

"Go, Peggy" said TFP.

Pegasus smiled and said:

* * *

**_"Ho! Ho! Ho! MERRY CHRISTMAS, LITTLE BOY OR LITTLE GIRL! Why don't you sit on Ol' Santa's lap? We can talk about the first thing that...pops up. Ho! Ho! Ho!"_**

* * *

**"WHAT THE FUCK?!"** yelled Seto, Yami, Seth, Marik, Bakura and even Shadi.

The audience was way too outraged..and sickened...to voice their disgust.

**_"EWW...that was just sick!"_** said TFP, whacking Pegasus with a rolled-up newspaper she was reading.

**_"DON'T YOU DARE COME NEAR YUUGI!"_** shouted both Yami and Solomon.

**_"Or Ryou!"_** yelled Bakura.

**_"Or Malik!"_** yelled Marik.

**_"Come anywhere NEAR Mokuba or Noah and I will personally see to your demise, you twisted fuck!"_** yelled Seto.

**_"I will see to that as well!"_** yelled Seth, didgusted.

**_"TOUCH SERENITY AND I WILL SO KICK YOUR ASS!"_** yelled Joey.

**_"So will we!"_** said Tristan and Duke.

**_"If you so much as THINK about coming anywhere near Ishizu...I will beat your fucking ass senseless!"_** yelled Shadi, shocking everyone!

**_"I am usually a peaceful man, Pegasus...however, if I see you anywhere NEAR Rebecca in a Santa Claus suit...or any suit...you will die!"_** declared Arthur...another shock.

"Go, Tristan" said TFP.

Tritan was quiet for a minute and said:

* * *

**_"If you'll be the iceberg...I'll be the Titanic and I'll go down on you."_**

* * *

"TRISTAN!" yelled TFP, looking slightly sick.

The audience was too busy laughing their heads off.

Seto was groaning.

"Tristan, please tell me that you didn't say that to Serenity...or any woman!" Yuugi yelled.

"If you did, I'll kick your sorry ass!" yelled Joey.

"Your last one, Peggy" said TFP.

Pegasus smiled and said:

* * *

**_"I'm Japanese. Do you have any Japanese in you? Would you like some?"_**

* * *

"OH...MY...RA!" yelled Yami.

"You creep!" said Seth.

"How sad...and discraceful!" said Noah.

"Tristan...take us home" said TFP, shaking her head.

Tristan ended it with:

* * *

**_"Do you remember the Little Red Riding Hood story? Well, here is your Big Bad Wolf right here!"_**

* * *

"YOU BASTARD! DID YOU SAY THAT TO MY SISTER?!" yelled Joey, with his fists ready to knock some sense into Tristan.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed Bakura and Marik. Even Shadi smiled.

"Just when I didn't think you could sound any more pathetic!" groaned Seth.

"LAME!" yelled the audinece.

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next segment. Please return to your places."

Pegasus and Tristan complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...The Molester or The Sidekick? We'll be right back for Round Eight!" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

As always, my thank you to PharaohFelicia and Sock Monkeys for their lines.

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Pegasus or Tristan...your choice.

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND EIGHT...DUKE v. NOAH**


	9. Duke versus Noah

Title: The Worst Pick-Up Line Contest

Authoress: TheFemalePharaoh

Genre: Humor

Rating: M

Disclaimer: NOT MINE!

**ROUND EIGHT : DUKE v. NOAH**

* * *

"Hey, guys! So sorry about the long. Long wait! I will try my best to keep that from happening again, ok? So...Welcome back to our show called...what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"As it is our custom here, we tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**PEGASUS: 9 ... TRISTAN: 6**

* * *

"The winner for this round is..._and I wish to Ra it wasn't true_...**PEGASUS**!" yelled TFP.

"WHAT?!" yelled Seto, Tristan, Seth, and Shadi.

"Congratulations...I think" replied Yuugi, stunned.

Tristan stormed backstage while Pegasus pranced to the Winner's Section, taking his seat next to Yami...who was backing away slowly.

"Now for Round Eight, will Duke and Noah please take your places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

"You're so going down, nerd" declared Duke.

"Keep dreaming, Dice Girl" snarled Noah.

Both men complied.

"Same ol', same ol'...you each get to say three lines. Noah won the coin toss, so he goes first."

"In your face!" yelled Noah.

"Fuck off!" countered Duke.

"You're up, Noah" said TFP.

Noah began:

* * *

"_**1 potato, 2 potato, 3 potato, 4, 5 potato, 6 potato, 7 potato more. I ask you to come through my bedroom's door, don't bother with the bed; we'll do it right on the floor!"**_

* * *

"Bloody hell, that's perverted" said Ryou.

The audience was giggling.

All TFP could do was shake her head.

"O...kay?" said a blushing Yuugi while the audience was in fits of laughter.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed Yami and Joey.

"Just when I thought there was some hope for you" sighed Seto.

"This isn't Mother Goose...so quit with the nursery rhymes, you idiot!" yelled Solomon.

"Go, Duke" said TFP.

Duke started with:

* * *

"_**I probably shouldn't say this but you look like my fourth girlfriend...and I've only had three."**_

* * *

"DUKE...WHAT THE HELL ?!" said TFP in shock.

"Yep, you are SO gonna get your ass kicked" said Malik.

"If you say that to Serenity..." began Jou.

"...**_I'LL_** kick your ass!" finished Tristan.

The audience was giggling in response.

"Be grateful these modern women can't send you to the Shadow Realm" said Bakura with Yami nodding in agreement.

"Come on, Noah" said TFP.

Noah thought for a minute and said:

* * *

_**"Ever hear of the song Genie In a Bottle? Why don't I rub YOU the right way...in your bedroom?"**_

* * *

The audience was booing and hissing their disgust.

"Remind me to NEVER listen to that song" said Ryou, shuddering.

_**"**_Damn" was all Solomon could say.

"I thought MY lines stunk!" yelled Seto.

"They did" opined Seth.

**"GO TO HELL, SETH!"**yelled Seto.

**"LADIES FIRST!"** countered Seth, while the contestants and audience laughed their asses off.

"Knock it off, both of you!" yelled TFP.

"Yes, Ma'am" whispered Seto and Seth.

"Go, Duke" said TFP.

Duke said:

* * *

_**"If you're left leg was Thanksgiving, and your right was Christmas...would you mind if I visited you between the holidays?"**_

* * *

**"DUKE DEVLIN...IF I EVER HEAR YOU SAY THAT TO _ANYONE_, I WILL BLOW YOUR FUCKING BRAINS OUT, YOU SICK ASS FUCK!"** yelled TFP, shocking everyone there, even the audience.

The audience soon recovered and was laughing their heads off at TFP's outburst.

"Dude, that was so nasty!" groaned Jou.

"I do believe I will skip Christmas dinner this year" Ryou shuddered.

"As well as Thanksgiving" said Yami.

"Your last, Noah" said TFP.

Noah grinned evilly and said:

* * *

"_**Baby, my love for you is like diarrhea...I just cant hold it in!"**_

* * *

"EEWWWWW!" yelled the audience.

"Nasty ass bastard!" said Bakura.

Yuugi and Ryou looked green and were about to faint.

"That was disgusting!" said Shadi.

"Duke...end it...please!" said TFP, returning from vomiting up her food.

Duke ended it with:

* * *

_**"I love every bone in your body... especially mine!"**_

* * *

"YOU SICK-ASS SON OF A BITCH! I KNOW YOU HAD BETTER NOT SAY THAT TO MY SISTER!" yelled Jou, with his fists ready to beat the hell out of Duke this time.

"If you ever say that to my sweet Serenity...I WILL GIVE YOUR – BONE- A COMPOUND FRACTURE!" yelled Tristan.

"You dumb ass! A penis does not have a bone!" yelled Duke.

"Are you volunteering to test that theory?" challenged Joey...along with Tristan.

The audience was just stunned.

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next segment. Please return to your places."

Duke and Noah complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...Dice Girl or Cyberspace Terrorist? We'll be right back for Round Nine" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

As always, my thank you to Sailor Felicia, Slave To Noah, and Sock Monkeys for their lines.

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Duke or Noah...your choice.

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND TEN...ODION v. SIGFRIED**


	10. Odion versus Sigfried

"Thanks for your longsuffering patience! I had some more personal crises that came up...for now they resolved themselvess and I hope it stays that way! I will try my best to keep that from happening again, ok? So...Welcome back to our show called...what?!" asked TFP.

"The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever!" cheered the audience.

"As always, we tallied up the votes from the last segment and here are the results..." said TFP.

* * *

**DUKE: 5... NOAH: 2**

* * *

"The winner for this round is...**DUKE**!" yelled TFP.

"SCORE!" yelled Duke.

"YOU WILL PAY" replied Noah.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever" said TFP.

Noah went backstage while Duke went to the Winners' Section..

"Now for Round Nine, will Odion and Sigfried please take your places at the gaming arena?" said TFP.

"Boo!" hissed Odion.

"Boo your damed self!" snarled Sigfried.

Both men complied.

"You already know'...you each get to say three lines. Odion won the coin toss, so he goes first."

"Yes!" yelled Odion.

"Whatever" rebutted Sigfried.

"Let's go, Odion" said TFP.

Odion began:

* * *

"_**Hi, my name is Odion. I'm funny, financially stable, and have a very interesting DNA structure."**_

* * *

"Yawn" muttered Bakura.

The audience just groaned..

Yami was just shaking his head as he laughed.

"Strike three-you are outta here!" said Duke while the audience was in stitches.

"What happened to Strikes One and Two?" l asked Tristan.

"Do we even NEED to go there?" sighed Seth.

"Point taken" said Ryou.

"You're Up, Sigfried" said TFP.

Sigfried cited:

* * *

"_**I've got a condom with your name on it."**_

* * *

"HUH?!!" said Malik in shock.

"EEEWWWWWW!" said the audience.

"You nasty bastard!"yelled TFP.

"You don't need any condoms, Sigfried...seeing that line will drive all people away" said Yami..

The audience laughed in response.

"Damn...I can see a restraining order in your future" said Shadi..

"Come on, Odion" said TFP.

Odion's breath hitched and said:

* * *

_**"You're ugly but you intrigue me."**_

* * *

The audience gasped and hissed their annoyance.

"Oh...my...Ra..." said Marik, groaning.

"Man, you suck" said Authur.

"That's just sad" moaned Pegasus.

"He's your twin" said TFP..

The contestants and audience were in stitches.

"Go, Sigfried" said TFP.

Sigfried cleared his throat and said:

* * *

_**"I'd marry your kids just to get into the family"**_

* * *

**"YOU SICK BASTARD"** yelled TFP, shocking everyone there, even the audience.

Once again, he audience soon recovered and was laughing their heads off at TFP's outburst.

"Nasty ass fuck!" groaned Malik.

"You Michael Jackson wannabe!" Bakura shouted..

"That was just low, Marik...insulting Michale Jackson like that!" said Joey.

"Last one for you, Odion" said TFP.

Odion smiled seductively and said:

* * *

"_**Hey, Baby...wanna see my HARD drive? I promise it's nowhere NEAR 3.5 inches and nowhere NEAR floppy"**_

* * *

The audience just shrieked in laughter.

"Good thing I only use CD-ROMs" said Seto.

"So do I" said Ryou, shuddering..

"Take it home, Sigfried" said TFP.

Sigfried ended it with:

* * *

_**"Are you menstruating? I have an organic tampon I can insert that will take care of your heavy days."**_

* * *

"YOU SICK-ASS (BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)" screamed TFP, shocking everyone again.

"Dude, that was just wrong!" yelled Duke.

"You sick bastard" muttered Solomon.

"You need to be placed under arrest and executed for that!" challenged Shadi.

The audience just gaped and gasped..

* * *

TFP jumped up. "TIME'S UP!! The winner will be announced at the beginning of the next segment. Please return to your places."

Odion and Sigfried complied.

"Now, then...this round is over and, once again, the time to vote is now, folks! Who will it be...The Egyptian Mr. Clean or Michael Jackson's Long Lost Twin? We'll be right back for Round Ten" said TFP.

The audience cheered.

* * *

If you have any lines, please submit them adn if I use them, you will surely get credit.

Well, folks...your turn to vote. Remember to review in order to cast your votes. Odion or Sigfried...your choice.

**NEXT CHAPTER: ROUND TEN...WEEVIL v. DARTZ**


End file.
